We All Need Somebody to...

Go ahead... Finish the song. "We all need somebody to leeeeean on." God made us to be social creatures. It's not good for us to be alone; we need friends. (If you don't believe me for some reason, try moving to a place where you know no one and see how long it takes you to get lonely.)

Most of us have family and typically we know that they care. Ideally, we have good relationships with our family. But we don't usually live with them past school and often they do not live close enough to be heavily involved in our lives every day.

So other than family... who cares about us? Who shares our struggles and burdens? Who do we tell our frustrations to? Who laughs with us at the funny things that happen? Who cries with us or just holds us close when when our hearts break? Who spends time with us, shares interests, depends on us, makes us feel included, accepted, needed? Who shares our triumphs and rejoices in our victories? Our friends.

We tend to develop groups of friends that we like to spend time with, people that we can do things with and who accept us. But even within a group, we usually have individual friends that we are closer to. Maybe we click with them better or share more interests or have more similar senses of humor. These people become your closer friends and they are the ones with the biggest influence on your life

Some close friends come and go like the seasons. They are a part of your life for a time, but as time passes and life changes, you gradually drift apart and go different ways. Others may not have the time to dedicate to keep up a close friendship. Some prove to be unworthy of your trust and may cause you great pain. But then there's that rare jewel, that special unique bond that doesn't come along every day.

Some friends are the Jonathan to your David. They are the once-in-a-lifetime friend. They seems to be cut of the same cloth; they share your soul. You find that you are "two peas in a pod," joined at the hip, "twin brother from different mothers." They redefine what "best friend" means to you. You could be very, very different, but they just "get" you. They touch you so deeply that you are never the same after knowing them. Once that kind of friendship is lost, it leaves you feeling as though a part of yourself is missing, gone forever.

I have experienced lonely times when I felt alone, desperately needing a friend and feeling like I had no one to "lean" on. And I have had good times where I had an accepting group of friends that felt as close as family. I have had friends that helped me, others that hurt me, and some that did both. Through it all, there is something that I have found... they are worth it! There is something special, priceless even, about having friends. Having friends is a blessing and a gift from God! Don't take them for granted!

There is so much that could be said on the matter of friendship. Since I find time and space inadequate, I want to share some thoughts and quotes of others that have spoken volumes to me. Like little gold nuggets, they contain great wealth in a small, condensed form.


About their vast influence:

• "Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend." ~ Proverbs 27:17
• "You’ll be with me like a hand print on my heart, now whatever way our stories end I know you have rewritten mine by being my friend." ~ Wicked, the musical 
• "Who can say if I’ve been changed for the better? But because I knew you I have been changed for good." ~ Wicked, the musical  
• "We call that person who has lost his father, an orphan; and a widower that man who has lost his wife. But that man who has known the immense unhappiness of losing a friend, by what name do we call him? Here every language is silent and holds its peace in impotence." ~ Joseph Roux

About the kind of friends to have:

• "Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful." ~ Proverbs 26:7
• "Be slow to fall into friendship; but when thou art in, continue firm & constant." ~ Socrates 
• "There are only two types of friends – those who encourage you to see how God can use you and those who simply use you for themselves." ~ Pastor Gaddis 
• "Make no friendship with an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go:" ~ Proverbs 22:24
• "Be courteous to all, but intimate with few, and let those few be well tried before you give them your confidence. True friendship is a plant of slow growth, and must undergo and withstand the shocks of adversity before it is entitled to the appellation." ~ George Washington
  

About what makes a good friend:

• "Friends are like walls... Sometimes you lean on them, and sometimes it is just enough to know they are there." ~ Unknown
• "A loyal friend laughs at your jokes when they're not so good, and sympathizes with your problems when they're not so bad." ~ Arnold H. Glasgow
• "The real test of friendship is: can you literally do nothing with the other person? Can you enjoy those moments of life that are utterly simple?" ~ Eugene Kennedy
• "A friend knows the song in my heart and sings it to me when my memory fails." ~ Donna Roberts
• "Friends are those rare people who ask how you are and then wait for the answer." ~ Unknown
• "A friend accepts us as we are yet helps us to be what we should." ~ Author Unknown
• "A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity." ~ Proverbs 17:17
• "A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother." ~ Proverbs 18:24
• "Ointment and perfume rejoice the heart: so doth the sweetness of a man's friend by hearty counsel." ~ Proverbs 27:9 
• "It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them." ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
• "A friend is one who knows you and loves you just the same." ~ Elbert Hubbard
• "You can always tell a real friend: when you've made a fool of yourself he doesn't feel you've done a permanent job." ~ Laurence J. Peter

About how to lose friends:

• "He that blesseth his friend with a loud voice, rising early in the morning, it shall be counted a curse to him." ~ Proverbs 27:14
• "A froward man soweth strife: and a whisperer separateth chief friends." ~ Proverbs 16:28
• "He that covereth a transgression seeketh love; but he that repeateth a matter separateth very friends." ~ Proverbs 17:9
• "Yea, mine own familiar friend, in whom I trusted, which did eat of my bread, hath lifted up his heel against me." ~ Psalms 41:9